Ever find yourself collapsing on the couch at the end of the day, completely drained, only to realize youstillhave a mountain of things to do before you can even think about sleep? Dishes, laundry, emails… it’s a never-ending cycle that can leave you feeling overwhelmed and stressed, even when you’re supposedly relaxing. I was stuck in that loop for ages, constantly chasing my tail and never truly unwinding. I knew I needed a change, something to help me transition from the chaos of the day to a peaceful night. I craved evenings that felt restorative, not like just another extension of my to-do list. So, I set out to create just that – a no-pressure evening routine, designed for relaxation andme.
My Journey to Evening Serenity
It wasn't an overnight transformation, that's for sure. My initial attempts at creating a structured evening were ironically… stressful. I tried to cram in too many activities, aiming for some idealized version of "perfect" evening productivity. It backfired spectacularly. I felt evenmorepressured and guilty when I inevitably skipped something on my list.
The key, I realized, was to strip away the expectations and focus on whatactuallyhelped me relax and recharge. This meant letting go of the "shoulds" and embracing the wants.It meant accepting that some nights, all I wanted to do was curl up with a book, and that was perfectly okay. It also meant intentionally building in time for mindful living practices that I could actually stick to.
It was about finding the sweet spot between having a general framework and allowing for flexibility. I began experimenting with simple habits and mindset shifts, gradually crafting an evening routine that felt genuinely supportive and calming. This is how I did it, and hopefully some of these ideas resonate with you too!
1. The Great Digital Detox (or at Least a Semi-Detox)
This was, hands down, the hardest part. I'm constantly connected, whether it's for work, social media, or simply keeping up with the news. However, I knew that endless scrolling was a major culprit in my evening stress.
My solution? A phased digital detox. About an hour or two before bed, I put my phone on "Do Not Disturb" (except for calls from a few key contacts). I also try to avoid checking emails or engaging in any work-related tasks.
Instead, I might listen to a calming podcast, read a physical book, or even just sit and chat with my partner. The point is to consciously disconnect from the digital world and reconnect with the present moment. This has made a HUGE difference in my ability to wind down.
2. Creating a Calm Oasis (My Sanctuary)
Your environment plays a massive role in your overall state of mind. I started paying closer attention to my surroundings, specifically in the areas where I spent most of my evenings: my bedroom and living room.
I made a conscious effort to declutter, removing anything that felt visually overwhelming or stressful. I invested in soft lighting, like fairy lights and Himalayan salt lamps, to create a warm and inviting atmosphere. I also added some cozy elements, like plush blankets, comfortable cushions, and a few of my favorite plants.
The goal was to transform my living spaces into calm oases, where I could truly relax and feel at peace. The difference in my mood when I enter a clutter-free, softly lit room is incredibly noticeable.
3. Embrace the Power of Rituals
Small, consistent rituals can be incredibly grounding and calming. I incorporated a few simple rituals into my evening routine, such as: Herbal Tea: Brewing a cup of chamomile or lavender tea is a signal to my body that it's time to relax. The warmth and aroma are incredibly soothing. Gentle Stretching or Yoga: A few minutes of gentle stretching or restorative yoga helps to release tension and prepare my body for sleep. Gratitude Journaling:Writing down a few things I'm grateful for each day helps me to focus on the positive and cultivate a sense of appreciation.
These rituals don't take much time, but they create a sense of predictability and comfort, signaling to my mind and body that it's time to slow down.
4. Planning for Tomorrow (But Not Overdoing It)
One of the biggest sources of my evening stress was worrying about the next day. I would lie awake at night, replaying my to-do list in my head and feeling overwhelmed by everything I had to do.
To combat this, I started spending about 10-15 minutes each evening planning for the next day. I write down my top priorities, schedule appointments, and make any necessary preparations. However, I'm careful not to overdo it. The goal is to create a general roadmap, not a rigid schedule.
This simple act of planning helps me to feel more organized and in control, reducing my anxiety and allowing me to sleep more soundly. I also make sure to acknowledge what I accomplished that day, rather than dwelling on what I didn't.
How does simplifying your day reduce stress?
The core of simple living and mindful living revolves around intentionality. When you simplify your day, you’re consciously choosing what to focus on and eliminating distractions. This reduces the mental clutter that contributes to stress and anxiety.
Imagine your mind as a computer. Running too many programs at once slows it down and can even cause it to crash. Similarly, constantly juggling too many tasks and responsibilities can overwhelm your mind and lead to burnout.
Simplifying your day is like closing unnecessary programs on your computer. It frees up mental space, allowing you to focus on what truly matters and experience a greater sense of calm and control. This could involve saying no to extra commitments, delegating tasks, or simply prioritizing your well-being. For example, I've learned to block out certain times of the day for specific activities (writing, responding to emails, etc.), so I'm not constantly switching gears and feeling scattered. This has made a huge difference in my overall stress level.
What are easy ways to live more mindfully?
Mindful living is about paying attention to the present moment without judgment. It's about being fully engaged in whatever you're doing, rather than getting caught up in thoughts about the past or worries about the future.
There are many simple ways to incorporate mindful living into your daily routine. One is to practice mindful breathing. Take a few moments each day to focus on your breath, noticing the sensation of the air entering and leaving your body. This can help to calm your mind and bring you back to the present moment.
Another easy way to live more mindfully is to pay attention to your senses. Notice the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures around you. When you're eating, savor each bite and truly appreciate the flavors. When you're walking, notice the feeling of your feet on the ground and the sights and sounds of your surroundings. These small acts of attention can help you to cultivate a deeper connection to yourself and the world around you. I often find myself practicing this while washing dishes -- focusing on the warmth of the water, the scent of the soap, and the act of cleaning.
Is minimalism the same as simple living?
While minimalism and simple living share some common ground, they aren't exactly the same thing. Minimalism is primarily focused on reducing possessions, while simple living encompasses a broader range of lifestyle choices aimed at slowing down, simplifying, and living more intentionally.
You can be a minimalist without necessarily embracing other aspects of simple living, such as slow living, mindful eating, or connecting with nature. Similarly, you can embrace simple living without necessarily adhering to a strict minimalist philosophy.
I think of minimalism as a tool that can be used to support simple living, but it's not the only tool. Ultimately, both philosophies are about consciously choosing what to bring into your life and eliminating what doesn't serve you, whether it's possessions, commitments, or negative thoughts. For me, reducing clutter has been a huge step, but the deeper work has been about prioritizing my mental and emotional well-being.
It's really not about thestuff, but thewhybehind it.
My evening routine is constantly evolving, as I learn more about myself and what truly helps me to relax and recharge. It's not a rigid set of rules, but rather a flexible framework that I can adapt to my needs and circumstances. And that's the point: your evening routine should be a reflection ofyou.
The most important thing is to be kind to yourself and to experiment until you find what works best. Don't be afraid to ditch what doesn't serve you and embrace what brings you joy and peace.
So, what’s one small thingyoucan do tonight to create a little more peace in your evening? Maybe it’s silencing your phone, lighting a candle, or simply taking a few deep breaths. Whatever it is, I encourage you to give it a try. Your evenings (and your future self) will thank you.